we out here
where we are
The French Company Grocer
hours
every single day
9am – 9pm
W/ CHEF CHADWICK'S FRIED CHICKEN & THINGS
🎶 SWEET REVENGE OPEN MIC - JOHN PRINE'S 5TH ANNUAL BIRTHDAY TRIBUTE 🎶BEGINNING AT 6 PM IN THE BACKYARD - ORDER IN PERSON
Pickup times are arranged into 30-minute windows. Our intention is to have your order ready near the beginning of that time window. Preorders are prepared in order that they are received online.
Our Official Suggestion™ is that you arrive at the beginning of your window, grab a drink, make a friend or two, and be patient and kind. If you are in a hurry and need your meal at an exact minute, please let us know in your preorder notes, or call the store at 432-386-4522 in advance. We are a very small, scrappy team, we are in the middle of nowhere in a tiny community of less than 400 with nearly zero light pollution. Enjoy it!
We can also text you when your order is ready if you provide your cell # in the order notes.
👉 all of our burgers are 100% Far West Texas Cattle Co beef & come with lettuce 🥬, tomato🍅, pickles, and onions 🧅 unless otherwise specified
👉 unless specified in the burger description (for example, The Madison and The Frenchie), burgers do not come with any ketchup, mustard, mayo, nor sauce. condiments are available on-site or in to-go condiment packets
👉 all burger plates listed below include a side of truly homemade potato chips
👉 any burger option can be made as a PORTOBELLO 🍄 burger instead of beef, just select this in ADD-ONS
a goat-cheese burger with caramelized figs
the perfect cheeseburger. the foundation of all other burgers on this menu.
just a burger that we forget to put cheese on
mushroom + swiss burger, dedicated to our friend Harold Cook
house special. fresh made aioli and BLEU CHEESE with two cornichons on the side
an over-medium fried egg will be found on your cheezer mingling with grilled jalapenos toreados
animal style: grilled in small puddle of mustard. sounds crazy but is truly wonderful and has umami out the wazoo. PLUS, caramelized onion.
even cowgirls like veggie burgers
think about it. double meat, double cheese 🧀 plus bacon 🥓
make it a double ➕$4
add bacon 🥓 to any burger ➕$3
add portobello mushroom ➕$4
make it a portobello burger instead of beef ➕$1
add a fried egg 🍳 to any burger ➕$2
extra goat cheese 🧀 ➕$3
substitute goat cheese 🧀 ➕$2
jalapenos 🌶 ➕$1
We have perfected the perfect food. The cheeseburger.
You don't have to get cheese. Some people do not get cheese. That's fine, but you might notice that the burger emoji is actually a cheeseburger, which is why we consider the cheeseburger the standard burger. 🍔
Our burgers are designed and optimized for the experience of eating, and burger enjoyment. This is a novel philosophical food idea that we invented. The burgers are beautiful, to be sure, but that is just a side effect of the fact that we really give a shit about our burgers.
P.S. If you can find another establishment in the entire country that offers 1/3lb burgers with LOCAL PASTURED BEEF, premium cheddar cheese, homemade pickles, and includes a generous portion of fresh fried potato chips with homemade ketchup, available regularly with no discount necessary, at a price that beats ours, your dinner is on the house.
We have always made our burgers with local pastured beef.
This season, we are proudly sourcing our beef from Debbie at Far West Texas Cattle Co. Here's a picture of Debbie. Would you buy beef from this woman? We did, we do.
More information about FWTCC's practices can be found on their site --> https://www.farwesttexascattleco.com/
dear whom it may concern,
one time I was on a flight to Singapore and as I took my aisle seat on the hefty 747, the flight attendant, who had a thick german accent, tucked me in like a little baby girl and gave me three dvds to choose from. “enjoy, little vun,” she said. the first was Free Willy, grandma's fave, hard pass. too sad. the second was Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. strange that there was a “Willy” theme going on there. i was already feeling nervous about going to Singapore where fun and candy wrappers are not allowed, so, no thanks. another pass. finally there was Total Recall, the perfect movie. i watched it two times through on the flight and nearly perfected my Arnold accent. it changed my life forever. my favorite scene from the movie is when Arnold —nay, Douglas Quaid— attempts to pass through Mars security dressed in drag. the helmet disguised as an old lady’s head begins to malfunction giving his costume away and alerting the security of a problem. Quaid removes the defective robot head and as it spasms and shorts, the repeating recording continues to play out of the pale robot mouth. “two weeks…twWooOo weEeEks,” it utters. Quaid throws the head at security and it explodes, allowing for a quick escape.
anyway, this grocer is my favorite spot in all of West Texas. there's specialty coffee, guitars humming, natural wine, wild tales of youth, chocolate chip cookies with hunkin' hunks of chocolaté, the best breakfast bacon burrito i've ever had in my several lives, and, of course, true love. everyone is welcome here so strap yourselves in to your early 2000s green dodge caravan with the skateboard stickers on the bumper and head over here before those burritos run out, you punk.
we out here
hours
every single day
9am – 9pm